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| 1year mark "burning of the shirt" |
So to be honest, this week has been pretty rough. There were several times this last week I thought about "quitting" this whole missionary thing.. not really, because I love it. But there was a lot of frustrating things.
First of all, my companion and I weren't able to find anyone to talk to us. It really makes the days drag on and on. These last few weeks and these 2 transfers have been the hardest I've worked on my mission, with some of the least amounts of "success." I also feeling like I'm doing the most I've ever done to become the best missionary I can be, but I'm falling short of what I can be. On top of it all, the Herrez family has been going through some things and have been unable to meet with us and go to church. They will still continue to progress! There's just some road bumps (policias muertas en cubano) in the way.
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On a much more positive note: Elder Cancino and I met the Amazing Spiderman of Miami this week! |
But yesterday we had a special training from Elder Dube of the seventy. Super sick guy from Zimbabwe. At the end of the conference, we had a short testimony meeting with half the mission. Everyone got to get up and bear a short 1-2 min testimony. They were short, but they were powerful. One of the Elders before me shared a few scriptures from Mosiah Chapter 4. This is one of my favorite chapters for a simple reason: It was reading this chapter that I first received a testimony of the Book of Mormon, and the first time I desperately asked and received an answer my Savior knew me.
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| Spidey even showed me the ropes... |
I was at BYU for a summer semester. I was feeling pretty alone and a little out of place in the Land of Mormons in Provo. All my roommates were out at a ward party, but I hadn't felt like going and stayed home to catch up in my classes. One of my classes was a religious study of the Book of Mormon, and I was behind in my reading. I was mostly "skimming" and my mind was focused on other things: feeling out of place, lost, and I believe I was even wondering if a mission was what I wanted to do. I put the book down, and thought for awhile over and over the doubts in my mind. I finally, for the first time in forever, hit my knees and began to let out my frustrations to the Lord. I asked if he was there. When I closed that prayer, I heard something tell me to open the book of Mormon, and actually read it. So I did. The whole Chapter is amazing, but I"m going to focus on the Scriptures I marked that night, and that mean the most to me.
5 For behold, if the knowledge of the goodness of God at this time has awakened you to a sense of your nothingness, and your worthless and fallen state—
6 I say unto you, if ye have come to a knowledge of the goodness of God, and his matchless power, and his wisdom, and his patience, and his long-suffering towards the children of men; and also, the atonement which has been prepared from the foundation of the world, that thereby salvation might come to him that should put his trust in the Lord, and should be diligent in keeping his commandments, and continue in the faith even unto the end of his life, I mean the life of the mortal body—
7 I say, that this is the man who receiveth salvation, through the atonement which was prepared from the foundation of the world for all mankind, which ever were since the fall of Adam, or who are, or who ever shall be, even unto the end of the world
19 For behold, are we not all beggars? Do we not all depend upon the same Being, even God, for all the substance which we have..
20 And behold, even at this time, ye have been calling on his name, and begging for a remission of your sins. And has he suffered that ye have begged in vain? Nay; he has poured out his Spirit upon you, and has caused that your hearts should be filled with joy, and has caused that your mouths should be stopped that ye could not find utterance, so exceedingly great was your joy.
27 And see that all these things are done in wisdom and order; for it is not requisite that a man should run faster than he has strength. And again, it is expedient that he should be diligent, that thereby he might win the prize; therefore, all things must be done in order
30 But this much I can tell you, that if ye do not watch yourselves, and your thoughts, and your words, and your deeds, and observe the commandments of God, and continue in the faith of what ye have heard concerning the coming of our Lord, even unto the end of your lives, ye must perish. And now, O man, remember, and perish not.
and then 2 verses in Chapter 5:
2 And they all cried with one voice, saying: Yea, we believe all the words which thou hast spoken unto us; and also, we know of their surety and truth, because of the Spirit of the Lord Omnipotent, which has wrought a mighty change in us, or in our hearts, that we have no more disposition to do evil, but to do good continually.
5 And we are willing to enter into a covenant with our God to do his will, and to be obedient to his commandments in all things that he shall command us, all the remainder of our days..."
That day I entered into my own covenant with the Lord, that I would forsake everything for him, even until the end of my mortal life. There was times I could run fast enough, and times I wasn't strong enough, but my Savior was there, and through his atonement he was able to make up for the shortcomings because I put my trust in him. So this week, I remembered that, so I would perish not. Bad weeks happen, but this week will be a good one. The Herrez family, and anyone else, will be able to overcome their problems as they rely on the savior. I'm grateful for the Book of Mormon; it truly testifies of Christ, and brings us closer to him. I'm grateful that in these latter days, he continues to lead and guide us. Not just from what he left us before he died, but today, because he lives today. He was resurrected, and he is the head of a church in the same way he was when he established his church--through direct, inspired revelation, to men called to be servants of God. I hope everyone knows Christ loves them! In a very real, personal way, no matter who you are, what you've done, or you're religion. That's my testimony.
Love,
Elder Juanes
Elder Jace Johns
5841 W 20th Lane
Hiahleah, FL 33016